23/01/2017

Dutch insight for the US: how to understand Trump best

Hi there all you US Citizens,

It's been a remarkable couple of months, hasn't it?

Your democracy, known for its delicate set of checks and balances, has unbalanced itself into a situation where a Presidential candidate that wins the popular vote by 3 million is not becoming President. Instead an extreme narcissist has now entered the White House and everybody is wondering how to read and understand his 'politics'.

Let me try and help you, the US public, in understanding how to deal with this new President. Because over here in the Netherlands we already have (had) some similar politicans running around and that has provided us with sufficient learning material.

It's always and exclusively about inflated self-esteem
The major rule for understanding narcissist is not to listen to their talk. It's never about the things they say. Narcissist have an intrinsic lack of self-esteem which they want to compensate by getting attention and compliments. As deep as their lack of self-esteem, as high is their need for compliments and admiration.

Narcissist lie by definition. They adapt their stance to make sure one thing is constant: their own image in the mirror of a reputable, God-like human being who can and will get all they want. And in order to preserve this image, they will manipulate their environment with a psychopathic lack of conscience.

When caught in the act (of lying), narcissist will deny and manipulate for so long that in the end people stop calling them out. We've heard footage of denigrating talk about the treatment of women and even that has not stopped a large chunk of US citizens from denying this erratic person entry into their most important public office.

How to understand their inside thinking: reverse their statements and accusations
The best way to understand what's going on in the mind of narcissist is to fully reverse all statements that they make. So when a narcissist says his opponent is rigging the elections, this explains exactly what he is doing at that moment. Or when he says that the press is lying about the turnout for inaguration day, you can bet that he is lying himself about it.

The one thing not to do is to expect continuity in thinking. A narcissist will never be caught in being consistent. They refrase, ly and don't care about being inconsistent. Trying to construct this consistence from the outside is of no use: there is none. The only consistent thing happening is that the narcissist is playing the power stadium just as long as he gets what he wants: attention and compliments.

For the current US president it is quite obvious that he has had a youth with a cold, ambitious father who never really cared about his own kids. The closest thing to true fathers that Trump ever came in contact with are the generals and corporals in the army. This explains his high ratio of former military among his staff. He tries to assemble support from fatherly figures.

The eternal tragedy of all this is that as hard as one can try, you can never end up with the so much desired self-esteem this way. Self-esteem is something gained from within and no manipulation or even US Presidency will help you get it.

How to end this: neglect the attention seeker or overcompliment into oblivion
The essential way out of an unhealthy narcist relation is to not share anything personal and try and cut all ties. In doing so one either fully neglects the narcissists or overcompliments them into oblivion. Alas to say that both strategies may be hard to execute when the person in question holds such an important office.

Yet, it could well be the case that the other players in the world game of power recognize Trump for what he is and seek more stable alliances with each other rather than deal with the erratic treats of Trump. Which gets you exactly where you don't want to be.

How this will end for the US?
I am sorry to say, but the end of a narccisist is always somewhat destructive. If we summarize Trump his whole business consists of lying, constructing an image, selling the image and moving forward to a next adventure before anyone discovers that his previous adventure was a full fail and financial disaster. The tiny info that was provided on his tax deductions already shows this.

Given that he is now playing his game on a national level, you may expect the US to spend more than it can, to alienate all international stakeholders until some geopolitical or health incident happens. When all the dust settles, the US will discover that Trump has only worked towards a greater image of himself and funds for his children. But the country itself will be worse off, unless perhaps for some costly highways, built by former business friends of the president.

The so called angry Americans that have voted for him, will then discover that he was indeed a con artist that robbed them not only of their vote, but also of their self-esteem as well as their health care. All that the US will have left is nice pictures, selfies of Trump golfing at Balmoral castle, a golden plated and redecorated White House and - god forbid - most likely an extra Trump face carved out in Mount Rushmore.



This beautiful country of yours will thus experience the reversed American Dream. Trumps reign will send you from a millionaires position into an isolated newspaper delivery boy (with a big mouth).

Hope?
I just hope for your sake that there won't be time enough during this 45th President's reign to ruin all the good things of the US. And I very much hope you will be able to see and live the next years as an intermediary phase, needed to learn a costly lesson about democracy.